Just a quick hitter on pronouns this morning. I was scrolling on Twitter, and a mother was complaining that she took her child to a doctor's office, and the receptionist had the audacity to refer the the child as "she" and "her" rather than "they" or "them". She said she corrected the receptionist, but the receptionist kept using she and her. What audacity that receptionist has!
All at once "they" and "them" as preferred pronouns bugged me. Why? Well, as I thought about it I realized I thought they and them are plurals. Was the mother saying the child has multiple personalities? Does the child have multiple identities? Does the child identify as a group rather than a singular person. Scratching my increasingly bald head, I decided I need to look it up.Lo and behold, the definitions have been updated. No longer are these words defined as plural to refer to either unspecified persons or a group of persons. The definitions have been modified to include use as pronouns for non-binary persons who don't feel "he" or him", nor "she" or "her" are an accurate reflection of who they perceive themselves to be. Non-binary meaning there have been traditionally only two choices, and neither of them fits a person's self awareness.
The most fun part of it is the mother making the receptionist out to be some kind of a bad person. When the kid gets into the room with the doctor is the doctor not supposed to know which anatomical features he or she will be examining. "I see 'they' have no penis, would 'they' like me to check 'their' PSA and give 'them' a prostate exam anyway?" "Would 'they' like a mammogram, or shall I pretend those aren't breasts?" These are the same fucking people who tell us to 'trust the science'.
While I'm on this rant... I went into the Whole Foods across the street Saturday to do an Amazon return. On the way in I saw a nearly androgynous looking person, presumably a woman, with green and blue hair, multiple face piercings, ear gauges, and an unusual and striking combination of colors and patterns in her clothing. I didn't have an issue with any of that. But it did strike me that this person, dare I say 'she', worked really hard to not look like her natural self, and also dressed so that people like me would notice and say, "What?"
Why in the fuck are so many people trying so hard to be something other than what they are? Instead of "being their best 'me'," what I see is people trying to be something they're not and then get mad at us if we think of them as what our eyes see.
I'm glad I'm retired and don't have to deal with this bullshit in an employment situation. I really am. If I was starting a company now, I would be open to hiring all races. All religions. Gay and lesbian people. Transgenders, too. Seriously. But you know who I wouldn't hire? People with pronouns in their bio. People with pronouns in their bio aren't looking for fair and equal treatment. They're looking for a fight, a slight, an argument, or a transgression to call out for the evil they see it as. I'm going to be facing an EEOC complaint from an employee because some other employee with big tits and a beard came in for a job and I didn't know how to address them? Nah. If you've got pronouns in your bio, I will treat everyone with dignity and respect, fairness and honesty, and when I slip up, suddenly you will turn someone's poor performance in the workplace around to me as the problem. Nope. Pronouns are a red flag, a signal that there's trouble ahead, trouble that I would avoid.
And 'they' and 'them' are plural. Always were. Still are.